The real estate blog Estately went through the somewhat pointless, but amusing, process of figuring out what people across the U.S. could buy for the same amounts of money as their typical homes.
In Alabama, for instance, where the median home value is $123,800, someone could pay Crimson Tide football coach Nick Saban’s salary… for one quarter of one game.
In Kansas, the homes are worth $129,400 apiece, which is about the cost of five suits of armor for guinea pigs. Yes, somebody has hand-made knight armor for guinea pigs, and it’s very expensive.
Or how about the Zamboni you could get instead of a standard $165,900 home in Wisconsin? Or the 64 baby lemurs you could afford — but really shouldn’t actually buy — instead of a $175,700 house in Illinois?
The most expensive homes can be found in Hawaii, where the median value is $504,500, an amount that could be spent on 59,000 pounds of the traditional Polynesian food poi, if you were super hungry and decided shelter wasn’t that important.
In Maine, the median home value is $173,600, according to Estately, and that money could be blown instead on — get this — 14,527 pairs of Handerpants.
Yes, those are underpants for your hands. See below.
The lowest median home value in America — $100,200 — can be found in West Virginia. That’s about the same price as 2,300 pounds of coal, perhaps an appropriate comparison considering that it’s the country’s biggest coal producer east of the Mississippi.
Our neighbors in New Hampshire could buy 346 season tickets to see their minor league Fisher Cats baseball team for the same $237,400 it would cost them to buy a home there, while Massachusetts residents could afford 1,319 vowels on the game show “Wheel of Fortune” for the price of a $329,900 Bay State home.